Beyond Loss there comes Hope! All apologies to start this blog with a bit of negativity but i am sure we all agree that loss is a part of entering the world of infertility. The loss may be from the fact that you may not become pregnant naturally. You might need medical help.. Loss may be from a miscarriage. It may be from having to consider medical options you never considered. It is like you enter the world of infertility with a loss, you start your journey ahead with Hope and end it with what you always wanted. Parenthood! For some this journey from infertility to parenthood is short and for some the journey is a bit longer.
Getting beyond loss requires you to choose hope over grief and allowing yourself to consider new possibilities.
Women and couples who successfully navigate the unknown world of infertility are able to take in new information, have their responses and feelings about it, and make the best decision they can about what to do next.
The medical treatments available today offer an extraordinary opportunity to create a family whether utilizing IUI, IVF, PGD or donor egg, sperm and embryo. Any of these may be viable options that you may not even have been aware of. Perhaps you never thought you would consider adoption.
It is natural to have fear and apprehension about any of these options if they are unfamiliar to you. It may help you to gain clarity by asking yourself the following questions:
- What were my dreams about the way I (we) were going to have a baby and start a family?
- Is there a solution available for my (our) problems?
- How many people have the similar problem like mine (us)? Have they been able to have a family now?
- What is keeping me (us) from moving forward?
- Have I educated myself fully about my medical options?
- Am I getting the right support and care?
- If I’m afraid, can I articulate my fears so that I can challenge them with information?
- Ultimately what I want? Parenthood or parenthood without medical assistance?
Having the courage to consider these things in an open and compassionate manner is the way to acceptance and moving forward. Loss does not mean your life will not be wonderful. It means letting go of what is not working in order to make room for something different.